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U2 Fanatic's Dating Profile


joe
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Imagine a U2.commer joining an online dating sevice and what his/her profile page might look like.

 

Introduction:  Love is blindness, but I am not.  On a scale of 1-10 must be a 40 in the looks department.  Hoping for 2 hearts to beat as 1, but will settle for Hold Me, Thrill Me, Kiss Me, Kill Me.  Been alone for awhile and looking for some Elevation of my 1 tree hill, if you know what I mean. ;)   

 

Sex:  Yes!  Thanks to that Miracle Drug, Viagra.

 

Age:  Middle age.  I am told this is the golden age.

 

Likes:  U2

 

Dislikes:  Everything else.

 

Favorite Movie: U23D.  I like wearing those funky 3d glasses. 

 

Least Favorite Movie:  Killing Bono.  Any home movie that has Gavin Friday in it.

 

Hobbies:  Getting higher than the sun and Numb with the help of Xanex and Wine.  I may have a substance abuse problem...GET OVER IT!

 

Education:  A graduate of the school of hard knox, where Stories for Boys consisted of centerfold pictures from the Playboy Mansion.

 

Aspirations:  To go to a U2 concert with Tam and Davcal and just before U2 plays Acrobat for the 1st time ever, both get arrested and miss it.

 

Dreams:  Same as aspirations.

 

Turn ons:  Bigwave spanking Tam with censorship.

 

Turn offs:  Yellow pants on 53 year olds and Zhiv's blogs.

 

If interested, please email U2.com and in the subject area put Love Rescue Me.  No unknown callers please.

 

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