Hey, Bono, what is wrong with you, lazing about all the time doing absolutely nothing? You act like you're busy or something running around performing and raising global awareness and recovering from spinal injuries. Well, you're not. You've a lot of work to do, my friend. Here's your official to-do list:
1. More water to wine, man, more water to wine.
2. I still see starving people on the streets, Bono. More loaves and fishes, dude.
3. That Ultra-Violet flying thing is sorta cool, but I wanna see you get on your boots and start walking on water.
4. Two words for you: World peace.
5. Finally, please, please, please can you use your not-so-secret magical powers to turn all the world's whining wankers into brightly colored cockatoos sold by traveling salespeople (preferably those salespeople directly descended from your mother's side of the family.)
I'd take on some of these issues myself, but I am absolutely swamped with complaining about how nobody else does anything in the world or how the actions others are taking just aren't correct, properly done, or, quite frankly, just not enough for my liking.